I failed to consider the miracle of life

This is a story time. TLDR is in the meme.

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After I turned 26 in Texas, I had to get on Massachusetts State Insurance fast before my bipolar disorder was unmedicated for too long.

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This means that I had to have a place to live fast, so I’m living in my grandmother’s basement while trying to get another living arrangement together. I’m embarrassed about it, but it’s relevant.

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There was a beautiful spider that took residence in the corner of my room. She was catching all sorts of large insects, and so I let her build her web there. I also liked watching her. She became my little friend.

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Well, my grandmother went into my room while I was petting Gracie the Corgi at the Farmer’s Market (there’s a corgi I see at the weekly farmers market), and she lost her shit. When I came back with my stepmother, she began hollering at me about the spider in my room, how there was an egg sac already, and I exposed the house to an insect infestation. I had to get rid of her.

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I will also say that I had my stepmother take a look at the spider web as well. I had never noticed a male spider to mate with, nor the carcass of a spider at the foot of the web. Had I known there was an egg sac, I would have relocated her outside sooner. Both my stepmom and I agreed that I should relocate her, but we did NOT think she had babies.

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Morgan Freeman: Olive and her stepmother were wrong. There was, in fact, a miracle of life going on that would lead to an impending disaster.

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I refused to kill such a beautiful creature, so I planned to gently scoop her up in a cup, and release her outside. I thought she was sitting on another insect she had killed… turns out it was an egg sac.

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The minute I tried to scoop her up, she fell off of her web and fled. Then… dozens of tiny spiders sprawled out in every direction. It was then that I saw the carcass of another spider at the foot of the web. Spiders take rough sex too seriously.

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Anyway, I’m freaking out because I know I will be in deep shit for this. I also feel bad because I am fairly certain that egg sac would not have exploded had I not touched it. Of course, panicking alone when conflict arises gets you nowhere. It’s always better to panic with a friend.

I’m frantically calling my stepmother and messaging her on Facebook (easiest way to reach her), while trying contain the reincarnation of Charlotte’s web. I finally get her on FaceTime. We are talking while I grab an antibacterial wipe, and wipe up the tiny spiders and the rest of the web.

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I DID manage to find momma spider, and safely released her outside without incident. I even showed my grandmother the cup as a reassurance that the spider was gone (I just conveniently left out the part where hundreds of tiny spiders took her place).

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I caught all of the tiny spiders, and my stepmom said she would do a second sweep and call an exterminator to be sure. I also found what I believed to be the egg sac, and sealed it tight in a jar. My stepmother said that my grandmother must never know about this incident, and I agree. My grandmother has a lot of anxiety that has worsened with her age, and we don’t want her paranoid that there are tiny spiders everywhere at all times.

I’ve seen several tiny spiders emerge from them already. Quite frankly, I think they’re adorable. But I know to leave them in the jar. I will take them to the woods tomorrow and release them.

They are REALLY TINY. So tiny, that it’s hard to get a good picture of them. I think they’re cute, though.

I thought I was doing a good thing by having a free bug catcher as a roommate. I failed to consider the miracle of life. I’m sorry.

Gracie tax! Her owner saw my previous post and said it was awesome! I told him I’d make sure to show off her cuteness again! She’s paralyzed in her lower body, so she has a cart – but she still has plenty of energy!

Second Gracie tax, because why not? I was trying to take a picture, and realized it was a video instead. 3 seconds of total heart-melting adorableness.

EDIT: I think this might be a slow-motion pic on further consideration. Not sure how I managed that…